Benoit

Change of pace.

Not many people watching wrestling anymore, and after this weeks tragic news, it could actually kill the sport all together. Chris Benoit, the Canadian Crippler, one of my favorite wrestlers of all time (with Jimmy "Superfly" Snuka, Bret Hart, and Honky Tonk Man) was involved in a double murder suicide, with his wife and son; a completely awful and unspeakable tragedy. I dont even know what to say.

Equally shocking is the names on the list of Wrestlers that have died pramaturely, as I have just googled it. Unbelievably shocking. It didnt even dawn on me that most of these guys are already dead. And these are just the famous ones; including all the half names and jobbers, the list is double. If this happened so prolifically in any other sport or entertainment, the government would shut it down, or at the very least, all sponsors and business partners would exit stage left.

Chris Von Erich
Mike Von Erich
Crash Holly
Kerry Von Erich
Owen Hart
Chris Candido
Adrian Adonis
Yokozuna
"Flying" Brian Pillman
Eddie Guerrero
Dave Boy Smith
Terry Gordy
Rick Rude
Elizabeth
Big Boss Man
Earthquake
Dino Bravo
Curt Hennig, Mr. Perfect
Bam Bam Bigelow
Junkyard Dog
Mike Awesome
Hercules
Big John Stud
Andre the Giant
Hawk
Sherri Martel

Me Chinese, me no dumb..

Ive been doing a fair share of travel lately, long ass haul travel over a few short months that has gotten me a slight bit dizzy and exhausted: Indonesia and back, Russia and back, India and back. I was tired, and I thought I had earned enough credits to stay away from the long haul trips for at least a handful of months... short trips within Europe would be no bother. 2nd week into May, just 2 weeks after my last disasterous India trip, I was asked to go to China beginning of June. ...arghh.. fine... whatever. Come to think of it though China is not that bad, its not like I was axsed to go back to India or worse, Iowa.


It also gave me the opportunity to move on to Elite level on Air Canada, without even flying one single Air Canada flight. You see Air Canada is quite sucky for the flying experience, and Ive boycotted them, but its not a question of loyalty since Im ready and willing to return once they right their ship with new seats, which they are in the middle of transitioning to as we speak. Anyways, Im quite the sneaky scammer now with the whole frequent flier traveller points thing, managing to get to lounge level on the One World airline alliance (BA, Cathay, Qantas, etc) and Sky Team (Air France, KLM, etc). My levels on the Star Alliance one though (which includes Air Canada, Lufthansa, Singapore Airlines, etc) has been left wanting... only acheiving Prestige status, which gives you jack squat apart from a fancier card with slight sprinkly effects. This China trip though would put me over the top, if I flew with Star Alliance... and its easy street lounge action all the way on all major Airline networks.

Didnt work out though. I actually already had the China flight booked with Lufthansa (which would give me the Air Canada pts, follow along here).. but that was a flight segment going through Shanghai. Last minute.. it was changed to Beijing... so the only flight that was available through that City was on Air France. Merde. So thats who I flew with... which negated my whole Star Alliance, Elite Status, Lounges all the way deal. PLUS, get this... PLUS... Air France aint that great, even in Business class... namely because the cheese selection they serve you is only the "taste like ass" cheeses that only frenchies like. What am I suppose to take with my red wine then?

China was good though. Apart from the automatic language awkwardness I always get in Asia... you know.. the "they speak to me all chinesey, I put on a retarded face and stay silent.. they look at me queer"... type scenario. Its doesnt cease to surprise me how quickly this country is developing, with the great economic boom of the last decade. The roads, compared to other countries anyways, are getting really good. Building development is growing like weeds, looking more and more modern. And this time, I got to go through Beijing, which means, Great Wall of China, Tiananmen Square and Forbidden City. One of the few places that is distinctly on my world list of things to do.


Tiananmen Square. That was great just for the infamy alone. Forbidden City. Amazing, especially cuz now Ive been to the real Imperial Palace, not counting the Vegas Hotel or Chinese food restaurants of same name. And the Great Wall. WOW. I have always wanted to go to the Great Wall. Always. Since I was a little kid. For me it was on a larger must see scale than Eiffel Tower, Statue of Liberty, Pyramids, Sydney Harbor, and Disney World (well no I kid, its tied with Disney World, lets be honest) And now Ive seen it. And the great thing here is, there are probably 3 or 4 more stations of the Great Wall I could go to, if /when I go again. I didnt even go to the most famous, and subsequently most tourist ridden one, Badaling, I only went to the Ju Yong Pass. Itll never get old.

Now, the only thing I need is a T-Shirt that says "I cant speak Chinese, Im Filipino" in chinese characters. This would be brilliant, the best Asian T shirt ever, maybe I can get Eric to work on that for me.

And oh yeah one more thing. Paris freakin Hilton. I tell you what, the weekend jail / police pickup / courtroom hearing saga was on full time and live on Chinese TV. Wow. I think now I would have to go to Antarctica to escape the likes of her. But I have an opening here to slag Americans again, so hahaha.. let me do it. In the Beijing Hotel, they had quite a few news channels... DW News (German), BBC News (British), CNN International, and Fox News Channel. I had an opportunity here to contrast and compare coverage. This is what I did, I ended up being held against my will watching the "Current Affair OJ Simpson" quality reporting on Fox news as they had moment to moment live coverage of the Paris Hilton proceedings. It was absolutely foul news reporting, commentary driven, with reporters and analyst shouting at each other their opinions. Bottom of the barrel. I would frequently flick over though to DW, BBC, and CNN International. At the sametime that Fox was going full Paris, full time for a good 3 hours straight... what was on the other news channels? Important things, like the wrap up of the G8 meetings in Germany, G8 discussions on the US's defence grid plan in eastern europe, the controversial G8 AIDs funding for Africa, G8 climate change initiatives, review of the latest Democrat and Republican leadership debates, and latest French Open scores. CNN International had 2 blurbs on Paris Hilton, but they were made in passing. SEE? This is what America gets, dumbed down Sally Jesse Raphael news. And Fox is the most watched news channel in the richest and most powerful country in the world.

And oh sorry one more thing again... just so I dont end this on a serious and commentary driven note, advice to yous in the future if you ever go to China. Never EVER swim in any swimming pools. I was staying at the Sheraton in Beijing, and by name alone, youd assume their facilities would be top notch. And it sure did look like it, the pool looked class. On an idle Friday, I went for a swim in the Hotel pool. I was wondering though why it was a little murky. After about 5 minutes, I noticed little gooey floaties that stick to my body now and then. Then I noticed all the chinese in the same pool.. clearing their throats all loud like, and hawking loogies straight into the pool as they played, just like how they do in Chinatown streets. ARGHH!! I was out of there in a flash, arms flayling, running away like I was in Grade 1 and I had just been kissed by a girl and quickly scrubbed myself down in the shower for 10 hours. Disgusting... I was dry heaving the rest of they day.



I found this on the great wall. STUPID HIGH SCHOOL BAND GEEKS. They get all the awesome trips.

Elementary School

You know Sudoku? The newest craze in puzzle brain food? (Apart from my aunt, who doesnt know what the rules are, so just puts random numbers in and then says "Im pinish! Dat wassant dat ard")

Well try this: Time yourself and name all your elementary school teachers (Anyone that is 12 years old doesnt count)

Kindergarten: Ms McCormick
Grade 1: Mr. Horn.
Grade 2. Ms Adams.
Grade 3: Ms Lady-I-cant-remember-who-got-the-whole-class-to-stand-up-and-say-the-lords-prayer-daily-even-the-hindus-and-sikhs
Grade 4: Mr. Rosen
Grade 5: Ms. Parker / Ms. Ng
Grade 6: Mr. H
Grade 7: Mr. H

That took me 12 minutes. I got stuck on Grade 3 and Grade 5. And for grade 3, I swear thats her real name..

{Post Edit note: 4 hours later.. Ms GOLDIE! Thank God... I was getting a headache}

Police vs Snow Patrol

Im currently in love with well done mash ups. This is one of the best ones Ive heard, coming really close to Hanson vs. QTip.

Also, with this I enter into my foray of posting bigamy. I put this on facebook as well. Blogger might get jealous now and send my computer a virus. Thank goodness I have a mac book pro.

Stupid Facebook and the Soviet Union

I think my personal facebook madness is finally slowing down... finally... which is a good thing so I can slowly get back to my normal life of doing sfa (sweetfeckall). Honestly i paid no nevermind to the endless invites id been getting over the last few months because id grown tired of Friendster and Myspace, so naturally I thought really this Facebook was no different. JM however performed an armlock submission on me until I joined last weekend... and further goaded on by Trisha who at the same time was kicking me in the head until I succumbed to their brutal bullying. I was coerced, manipulated, a little boy who was given free candy by the manipulative drug dealer stranger, even though he only likes healthy vegetable sticks. Next thing you know, Im up until 3am every night for the last week scoping out profiles to find out who has hot friends... disaster. I couldnt even blog anymore (ha) because i now had to memorize the multiple baby names of friends i havent seen in 10-20 years, join social groups with old elementary school cohorts, and discuss with a refound former roomie (turned lawyer) the merits of Jessica Simpsons new tan and her recent migration towards constantly exposing obscene amounts of cleavage. My friend Christine reminded me though that we must be good citizens and treat Facebook with respect... use it for good and not evil. And I am after all a good boy... so I will not let it lead my life. From now on, Ill restrict myself to checking it only once a day. Full stop. or maybe two...

Soooooo... as predicted India trip 3 sucked. Even worse actually than I thought it would because multiple things went wrong. First, British Airways lost half my luggage as I arrived in Kolkata, which left me totally ill equipped to do my work duties. In fact the bag is still lost, 1 month later. Sometimes I really hate airlines, I went through the past 10 years never losing any bags ever, and now that it has turned 2007, Ive lost bags 3 times this year already. WTF. Secondly, half related to the lost luggage, I pulled in a 103 hour work week, which is a personal best.. or opposite, personal worst; I cant believe I went 3 digits. Thirdly, I was in the Indian jungle again as you know, but this time there was no power or running water at the guest house. I went 4 days, working 15-20 hour days, without showering or shitting on a proper flushing shitter. And the worst of it was I was in India, and the BO of my local collegues would build daily to excruciating levels. It would KNOCK YA seriously, like a De la hoya left hook to the head... argggghhhh.. you dont understand.. I think we are talking Bigfoot stench levels, concentrated to a brown molasses substance that everyone would stick in their armpit... I could barely eat. The saving grace was a German co-contractor that was there with me, so I had a whinge partner to hate ever second of it with. Misery loves company.

Russia update: long, almost 1.5 months in the making. Okay. Heres my impression of the former Soviet Union;

-imagine every large scale projects ghetto youve ever come across in the States; you know like New Jack City type... The towers in The Wire... South Chicago... huge concrete decrepit buildings side by side, awefully designed to pack in sorry people as densely as possible. Now take that thought, and imagine a whole city where that was all there was to housing. A whole city of only project buildings. Thats where everybody lived. And then repeat for every city in a whole country. The largest country in the world no less (not including, so much, the bigger cities like Moscow and St Petersburgh, because they were full of party government people that had it better through the years). This is how the Soviet system operated, free housing free everything, but unless you lucked out or positioned yourself better or where good at sports, you were more likely to be stuck in a box within a big ugly concrete building like everyone else. A complete eye opener ( I didnt take pictures, for some illogical reason, I thought someone would steal my camera, it looked like a whole city of projects for fecks sake).

-this was the first time as well that I fully did feel completely illiterate. It was different in Russia than say when I was in Japan or Korea or China... cuz there you knew where you were, everything and everyone looked asiany, so it was always firmly within context; so naturally not being able to read characters didnt affect you as much. You were in a way, mentally prepared for the literal rejection. Russia though... it was different because everyone looked Russian first and foremost, but also European. It was a complete white wash, so subconsciencely you get tricked. Further compounding difficulties was the writing in Russian Cyrillic.. with backwards Rs and Ns, upside down Us and some 6s thrown in. I kinda know now what its like to be dyslexic. Most of Europe, even though there are different languages in each country, at least they use the alphabet, so you could in a pinch, when required, sound things out. In Russia? Please, feck if I know what anything said or sounded like.

-Still alot of russians wear those big furry hats. And all the women wear the jackets with big hoods with fur along the rim. A russian stereotyped that was confirmed, this actually delighted me to no end.

-Another thing that delighted me, seeing Ladas. Old shitty, dirty ladas, driving around everywhere. Brilliant.

-At restaurants? The table settings are like this: fork spoon knife (standard), big plate small plate (standard), water glass, wine glass (standard), and shot glass. For vodka. At every table setting. So awesome...

-Oh yeah, russian girls are hot. there is no joke there, its true. Wow. Especially when they are looking at you all bundled up with those crazy blue eyes through those furry rimmed hoods.

-In the end though, everything was completely new and stimulating, I had a ton of fun. Especially pleasing was the insider conversations we had with our Russian customers over dinner, who could barely string two words of english together, but just enough to get the point across of answering our questions regarding what it was like living in the old Soviet state. Amazing stories. Also, I kept myself amused by constantly thinking in the back of my head, how anyone of these guys could probably kick my ass in Chess. They all looked liked freakin grand masters. Paciba... ('Thank you', the only russian I learned to say properly; apart from Da and Nyet....)

Catherine Tate - Translator

Wanted to jot something down just to make sure i got a post in this month. Its kinda sad when Ive been so inactive that my only current accomplishment or actually "great acheivement" is making sure I perpetuate my current streak of posting at least once a month... no way i would want that slip... but kinda lackluster.

Needed to get something in though cuz Im off to India again tomorrow (yes trip #3), and this is probably my last day of internet access before then end of the month. So yeah, 3rd trip to India in 7 months. My first trip ever that I have completely detested and the only trip ive looked at as having totally no redeeming qualities in the slightest. I prehate this trip infinity. Infinity plus 1. Infinity to the power of Infinity. Id rather let a Blue Whale have mad sex with my ear. So, dont talk to me about it... just a combination of bad customers band location bad flight details bad social timing and bad work schedule . Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad...

Just got back a couple weeks ago from Russia Paris Bucharest.. and I have a lot to talk about it... itll come soon...

Catherine Tate is funny though... enjoy

Maria Sharapova

Quick update... Im off to Russia tomorrow for work, will be there for a week, in a small town called Solikamsk, which is located in like the Saskatchewan of Russia... even still Im excited. Also I hear Russians are racist, Mike was just telling me that the only two races russians dislike more than asians are blacks and chechnians... but only really the Chechnians that look like Borat... but hey whatever should still be a slice..

Probably, wont be posting for a while then, for good reason, cuz then immediately after I head off to Paris for a week to meet up with Chin, and then before he heads home, we go to Budapest Hungary for the weekend.

Until then heres at least one pic, which I failed to post, from my trip to the French Open last year... or-rev-why-or...