Leap year

Its leap year day. I have to post, even though its quite well established Im a lazy blogger; I have, at the very least, this small duty of posting on a day that only happens once every four years. After all its the sole summer olympic indicator. This is for Yao Ming. I cheated and started this baby before I left work. I even typed it in Lotus Notes, ABB's mail program to make it look all Kardinal Offishal. To get a head start.

So here I am now, though, at home, listening to the Klaxons (really loud styles styles, which is the best way), and Im struggling. And I wish I had a point to write about, but I really dont. Kind of in one of those writers block pickles, and who would really want to read about the struggles of uncreativity and non-inspiration. Ive always aimed to write some small vestige of wordsmith excitability, and stay away from sedative status. But with this post, geez, I hope contradiction doesnt cause cancer. Im winging it.

Oh yeah heres something Leap year worthy, did you ever hear of the custom where February 29 is the only day Women are allowed to propose to men? Ive never ever heard of this, its an old ancient Scottish custom I believe that has indured to modern times,and it had some men at work completely paranoid today. Finian got up early and left for work before his girlfriend woke up this morning... for example. And some lads turned off their mobiles for the whole day, especially when on Today FM this morning, Irelands National Radio station, they facilitated and broadcast live this girl proposing over the air to her boyfriend on his mobile phone. He did say yes, but it was more like in the "Okay fine" type of tone. This had me in stitches... I would say after that, loads of lads were switching off trying to save battery power today.

Instead of trying to force invent something further though, I might employ what I usually did in elementary school for school reports; I plaguerized: I borrowed from another website and I am posting an article on the top ten "rap songs that white people love". This made me laugh, because, its so funny cuz its true. I call this the 'Scotty-Too-Hottie' List. "YO V. I. P. Lets Kick It" [cue Queen music]

The Top 10 Rap Songs White People Love

10. Positive K - I Got A Man

White People’s most beloved rap duet.

White Girls in particular love this song because it gives them a chance to playfully reject a male suitor’s advances on the dance floor before blowing him at the end of the night. It’s empowering.

9. Digital Underground - The Humpty Dance

Humpty Hump was rap music’s greatest alter ego and actually a good MC but all White People know (and love) him for is "I like my oatmeal lumpy," and "Burger King bathroom."

Fucking White People.

8. Biz Markie - Just A Friend

Oh my god do White People love this song. Particularly frat boys. Why? I don’t know.

Unlike most of his peers on this list, the Biz is a guy long deep in the hip hop scene with lots of cred, yet to White People he’ll only ever be that fat funny-looking black guy with the wig who sings bad.

7. Young MC - Bust A Move

I believe there is a law that requires this song be played at every Rock n’ Bowl.

Like that the police shut down the bowling alley if it doesn’t comply.

6. Rob Base and DJ Easy Rock - It Takes Two

Knowing the words up to "I get stupid, I mean outrageous" is standard and unremarkable.

Knowing everything up through the hook means you’ll be frenching at 80s Night.

5. Naughty By Nature - Hip Hop Hooray

Before he was shooting porn and marrying/divorcing Pepa (a near miss on this list herself), Treach was teaching White People the world over how to wave their arms from side to side above their heads while singing nursery rhymes.

Hip Hop Hooray is not only a great way to melodically celebrate life, it’s something to buy airbrushed on a T-shirt when you’re at the beach for a week on your summer vacation to show that you’re down.

4. Tag Team - Whoomp (There It Is)

Man, what was the fucking story about this song and the other one that came out at exactly the same time by, I believe, 95 South called "Whoot There It Is?" Somebody fucked somebody else over big time there.

The weird thing about this song - ubiquitous and beloved by Wisconsin grandmothers that it is - is that its lyrics contain the words "motherfucking," "nigga," "shit," and references to smoking dank. Crazy!

I remember watching The Box video network (where I learned everything I know about Black People) and seeing Tag Team’s follow-ups to this one: "Whoomp (Si Lo Es)" and "Addam’s Family Whoomp." I’m not kidding.

3. Vanilla Ice - Ice Ice Baby

This one song on the list that White People pretend to only like ironically. Don’t be fooled: deep down White People still think Ice is 110% gangsta.

I remember back in the day "battling" another sixth grader at the ice skating rink in who could rap the first verse of this song the fastest. The kid was Asian, so I won.

2. House of Pain - Jump Around

White People will never be completely comfortable with Black Music so anytime they’re given the opportunity to like a song by one of their own race they go fucking overboard (see this record and all five thousand Eminem songs).

If you’ve ever seen Black People comedy, you’ll be familiar with the notion that White People have no rhythm and can’t dance. This is true. That’s why they will embrace with both honky arms any song that makes it OK for them to not actually dance during it or that tells them exactly what to do and when to do it.

If you go to a club and this fucking song comes on all the White People will literally jump around. I fucking promise you.

1. Sir Mix-A-Lot - Baby Got Back

Go to a karaoke bar - get the song list - check the rap section - if there’s only one song, this is the song - every fucking time, this is the song.

This, like a number of the other rap songs White People love, features prominently sexual themes addressed in a humorous fashion. I think it’s White People’s inherent prudish squareness that makes them get all giddy about "naughty" rapper songs.

Original Link http://www.catsandbeer.com/music/the-top-10-rap-songs-white-people-love

American Idol

I dont really watch American Idol. Normally itd be my kinda thing cuz I 'bah' with the best of them, but really honestly I dont follow this show. Loved it in the beginning- but like Survivor, Its kinda boring now. Funny enough, I heard word that there is a new Filipina girl on it so I decided to steer my way in that direction in youtube to check it out.

Jurys out though. Really I should be voting along group lines, represent for the Philippines. And I have a good history in this respect... Manny Pacquiao is my man, Enrique Iglesias is God. Batista is my fav. wrestler (well not really, but I dont hate him) Ernie Reyes Jr was my favorite kid actor in the mid 80s. And I dont even mind Rob Schneider at all. Its only La Bamba that I truly detest like a spider-snake hybrid.

This Ramiele though... Im trying hard to like her but I just cant. Theres just something about her, I dont know... its hard to explain but to me she sounds too Hong Kong Singapore Filipina hotel lounge act singer-ish. Great voice, but just not my style. She has cool hair though, Ill give her that... and she doesnt say her last name all 'Englishified' way, but proper harsh Pinoy way. Thats really cool, she earns brownie points there. Cuz I dont even do that (Ahhh BEE SHa), she shows me up in that respect.

Im thin slicing... and making the decision on gut feel. I dont feel her as a winner, and Id much rather support that blondie curly haired nanny, nice girl, she is much better. Im not a very good Filipino when it comes to American Idol.

And oh yeah, theres a post coming tomorrow because its leap year. I like leap years.

H O R S E

Will Ferrell kicks Bill Waltons ass in basketball. Its true even though it sounds funny..

Boyz II Men

Like most days, actually ever day, I was on youtube randomly wandering the world of the video. I dont know how, like really you just stumble into most things on youtube, a thread or path thats never really duplicatable (another one of my words) the next day, youtubes's contribution to chaos theory. Its like rooting through a favorite quirky roadside market, you dont quite know what to expect but you go on with yourself, always with the knowledge that youll find at least a few bits and pieces that delight you to no end.

Today I walked the streets of motownphilly (and back again, doin a lil eastcoast swing). I was watching a video of a Amy Heckerling movie trailer, once it ended, I followed a new string from the post video pop up menu, and all of a sudden there they were again. Slim. The deep voice guy. The guy who sings with ticky head movements like he has tourettes. And then theres Cho, the guy with the glasses. (Cho, if youre reading this, you cant deny it for 16 years, he still and always will look like you; like its not a bad thing. Its like your other twin, Supersonics point guard Earl Watson). The thing is, up until today, I had selectively erased the memory of Boyz II Men. I dont know exactly why, maybe its because of the early 90s pop period I was later mildly embarrassed of, at a time when it starkly contrasted new alternative music I was being introduced to (Janes Addiction, Pearl Jam, Nirvana) or even the good HipHop at the time (Dre The Chronic, Snoop), all of which now are considered hall of fame classics. And to compare, Boyz II Men are an after thought these days, especially compared to those guys. So I kinda forgot about them. Their CDs dont show up on my CD rack anymore, and their songs are absent from my iTunes library. Its strange logic really, considering the person we are talking about is me, the same guy who has no shyness whatsever regarding my affinity for Backstreet Boys and NSync, or for that matter New Kids on the Block. Only thing I could think of in defense is that..... maybe.... its because they're black preppy..... like Carlton; whoever really like Carlton.

Still though its hard to fault them.. even if they over did it with the dated and now seemingly ridiculous midsong "talking to the girl in a sensitive deep voice" interlude technique. haha I still cringe at those. BUT... after reviewing their videos again on youtube, some of which I havent seen in over 10 years... I was warmly surprised that I knew all the words. I cant even say that about Bon Jovi (I know all the Bon Jovi important chorus bits though). I also forgot HOW MANY songs they had. End of the Road, Water Runs Dry, Bended Knee, (its so hard to say goodbye to) Yesterday, One Sweet Day (with skinny Mariah), let alone influencing a full on run of successful copy cats: All 4 One, Hi-Five, Color Me Bad, Jodeci, Shai, to name a few. You know your shit smells good when everyone starts copying you. Even the way you dressed. Remember now, in the early 90s, if you werent wearing plaid dirty jeans grunge... you were wearing dress shirt with tie and jeans and a formal jacket. Because that what Boyz II Men wore in their videos. Id also bet that they defined and dominated the Graduation Prom Theme Song for every high school in the whole early 90s, let alone provide every teenage boy in the early mid 90s some sweet makeout action music. I dare anyone prove me wrong.

Anyways what Im trying to say is that they were pretty good, and I forgot that. This is what happens when you spend too much time on youtube. You start remembering back in the day, when things didn't suck, even though they do now. LOL. Still wont add them to my iTunes library though.. some things belong on youtube.

Before I end this though... I want to post a personal favorite, again from youtube. Quite possibly the best commercial Ive ever seen in my entire life. Its been playing here in Ireland and the UK for 4-5 months, and I have no idea if it plays back in North America. But I love it, so good... enjoy. Notice the purple.