BA Terminal 4 Gate 1 Terrace Lounge

Familiarity breeds contempt, so its now kardinal offishal... Heathrow is the 2nd worst airport in the whole wide world. (Kolkata Netaji Subhash Chandra Bose International Airport keeps the championship of the world belt, what can I say, its the lingering BO and the bobbleheading). Heathrow sucks. Transfering here between Terminals sucks. The instructions and signage suck. The people who work here suck, and their stuck-up pompy accents while lecturing you and not listening to your problems sucks (You know youve been in Ireland too long WHEN... you start hating the English) . The funny thing is Im saying this from the comfort of the BA Terrace Lounge, with free eats and free liquor... yet I still complain. That has to show you the level of suckiness... they give you free stuff and it stills sucksballchoppa.. (I will throw in a disclaimer before I continue, my exposure to the big American Hubs has been limited in the last two years.. namely LAX, JFK, LaGuardia, OHare and Hotlanta, etc airports that Ive on the most part sucessfully avoided so I still reserve the right to recast my vote if that lack of frequency changes)

Sad thing is I use to love this airport, because back in the day of the rare transatlantic trips from Canada, Heathrow was the symbol and gateway to Europe. Arriving Heathrow meant good things; hell, great things. European Vacations, London visits, Big Ben, Picadilly Circus.. my London London Bridge, wanna go down like, London london london .. etc etc.. Illsaynomore... but now I try to avoid it as much as possible and if I can travel through elsewhere (Schipol Airport Amsterdam is good. Charles DeGuille Paris not so much... but still marginally better than Heathrow, even though they are French) And again I blame George Dubya. If it wasnt for the increased global Muslim tensions, the supresssive security that is overtly prevalent in American airports would of not swung out to the rest of world. Heathrow is now just as bad as an American airport. Tony Blair got into bed with the wrong man.

By the way, I didnt get upgraded. Its welcome to cattle class. MOOOO... (Gawd I love being a snob. Being a snob rules)

Okay, I better go now, I need to get drunk off the open bar. And eat at the free buffet. And watch Chelsea football on the widescreen. This place really sucks...

(cyas soon)

British Airways World Traveller Plus Flight BA85

Hi, coming home tomorrow.

Cant wait. Again, help me pray for an upgrade... :P Im so feckin spoiled its actually dizzying...

c ya soon... contactable on text on my irish "mobile" +353879922031. Ill have a new number for home when i get there... lates yo..

Christmas in the Drunk Tank

It took me three Christmas', but I finally came around to it. My next Christmas song. As you may know, I tend to frame Christmas seasons in song. In the past two years Ive talked about my pantheon of xmas tunes: Do They Know its Christmas- Band Aid, Little Drummer Boy- David Bowie and Bing Crosby, Last Christmas- George Michael.

Considering that I live in Ireland though, Ive saved one for this year. Its the infamous Irish Folk band The Pogues and their Fairytale in New York. As far as Christmas goes, an Irish Christmas no less, its great craic. You see in Ireland, during the Christmas season, the one thing that everyone makes sure gets done, every family just gets pist drunk. I tell no lies. Really, in all honesty, getting drunk and going to mass; those are the two pillars of irish family christmas tradition. And the Pogues do a perfect job of capturing it in Song...

And the Pogues, are somewhat of an funny, abnormal story because of their somewhat controversial lead singer. Shane MacGowan is ugly as sin, with his big protruding ears, alley bum hair, pasty irish white feverish skin, hes the closest you can physically come to an Orc in facial construction. And his infamous teeth are the worst you would ever possibly see, teeth that would make an eskimo baby cry. He also insists on only singing drunk, he always sings with a drink in his hand, he always sings with a fag in his other hand, and to be honest, he really cant even sing very good, quite possibly the worst singer ever to make loads of money actually singing professionally. Its like the greatest magic trick of all time, making people think him singing is worth paying money for. But thats the Irish for ya, because he is a musical icon, a symbol of counter culture. And again, point and case, it joins my top list of christmas songs. figure that.

Now Itll be a stretch to figure something out for next year... not much left cept maybe Boney M.

No expansive xmas list this year Im afraid. I was twistedly dissappointed with the success rate of last year, a big Oh For. Ill quickly mention somethings though..

Nintendo Wii. PS3. Anything and Everything Cashmere. Any linens with a thread count above 300. Thick Luxury Terry Cloth Towels and Robe. Victorinox Rolly Briefcase. Dinners at top level restaurants. Canucks Tickets.

Mwahh...

India Part 2

Im thinking of shaving my moustache. Now getting rid of this stache... its like .. um... giving back a gold medal from the Cool Olympics. To be honest, its is so unbelievably bad.. its good. Its so completely insanely horrible (specially with my spacey asian facial hair) its feckin kewl. And I really like having it; for the craic, for shits n giggles, for the 'who gives a shit' attitude. Id actually post a picture of it, but it might crack your monitor, from all the overwhelming awesomeness...

Just got back two days ago from another week in India.. yet again, which actually inspired the moustache move. Really dreaded this trip actually going into it, considering how bad the last one went.. plus I was only booked in World Traveller Plus (Deluxe Economy) Seats for the flight... which is ASS. Granted its not exactly livestock cattle class like proper economy, but still. It wasnt going to be fun being back there with the plebs.

This time though it didnt turn out too bad. It helps knowing what youre getting into.. and with expectations already so low, everything better becomes icecream with a cherry on top. First I got upgraded on the way there, which brings us up to par for the course. Then this mill ended being way more organized and prepared than the other shit hole. Now saying this is like saying Tonya Lee Harding is better at boxing than Steven Hawkings... so we are talking barely competent here, but still... its a remarkable step up, given the differential as oppose to the absolute. There were minimal work delays, I had a PSP and a book to cover my downtime (just finished the Anansi Boys from Neil Gaiman... pretty okay. about 15% my way through PSP Grand Theft Auto). Also to top it all off, the temperature was not hell hot like last time, a decent 25-28C. And there were monkeys near the guest house complex. Monkeys!! Class, I tell you. Just dont stare them in the eyes and show your teeth... otherwise your in trouble...

And on the way back... I got Upgraded again. Poor Ronan didnt though, but oh well, what can you do. (HAHAHAHAHA.. thats really funny shit.. from my point o view anyways... he was a bear) So this time India was pretty good. I got my Darjeeling Tea too... and Assam Tea. Time to make some sweet sweet chai...