Hi Method Man

Im so behind its not funny. Im digging myself a deeper and deeper hole. I think Im slowly finding something about myself, though. The new thing I found out about myself is this: Im not very good on following up after big excursions. I dont know how to describe it, but ever since I started this thing, the hardest time that Ive have had, on consistent basis that is, has been following up after a big long trip. Normally youd think this would be easy time time to write... lots of stories, lots to talk about, it should be effortless, almost write itself. That would be the logical progression. However, I guess, it doesnt quite work for me that way, and it may just come down to this: I have a natural instinctual resistance to anything that may be seen as showing off, even in the slightest. For example, in typical conversation, I dont talk about anything Ive done unless someone asks. I never offer myself up, and I dont bring attention to myself. Im that wallflower in the corner. Come talk to me, and Ill talk no problem... but when it comes to imposing myself, Ill always have a hard time. Always.

Enuff excuses though, Sydney / Whitsundays / NZ was a blast. Who can really complain about having a full month away? Apart from my emptied wallet, that is. Sydney, being now the 3rd time visiting, is still one of my favorite cities in the whole world. It goes like this -> Sydney, Vancouver, New York, Madrid, Kolkatta. Thats my top five. Except Kolkatta. Im joking, I hate that shithole. Replace Kolkatta with Calgary. Again Joking. Paris. Not joking. And I would probably like Paris and Madrid more if I could actually understand people. So, Im probably under rating. Lets talk again when Ive mastered Spanish and French, whenever that is. Bonjour, que tal?

Heres the thing with Australia and NZ though, the housing dwellings are only designed for 9 months of the year. No central heating. And I was there during the southern hemisphere Winter, so its a big deal. Im sure Ive talked about this before, but its such an important topic of discussion that I just have to bring it up again, houses down there NEED FREAKIN HEATERS. Just because its super duper hot most of the year doesnt mean you can forget about the 1 or 2 months of the year you freeze your ass off in your own home. Its ridiculous. Like there should be some kind of 'cop on' eventually, when your blankets are crispy from ice in the morning, and it feels like your camping, and youre walking up in a tent. Its too cold.

Second thing about down there: They make the best burgers. I missed this dearly from the last time. The Aussie burger and Kiwi burgers are masterpieces not found anywhere else, obvious ying for yang retaliation for the disgusting fermented bread spread mistake better known as Vegemite. Heres the details: Burgers as big as dinner plates, with the typical lettuce tomato fillins, plus a few key additions - fried egg, aussie relish (which is like a sweet worchestershire sauce), beetroot, and sometimes pineapple. Its a wierd mix, but it just simply works. Its for these choice moments that Warrant had it exactly right, and Heaven isnt too far away. And as Linda has always described it, a good Aussie burger is measured by the amount of juice that dribble down your forearms as you eat.

Third Impression: Although Id been to NZ before, Id never been to South Island. And now that I have, I can declare South Island is freakin dope awesome to the power of gnarly. Didz and I did a week with a Jucy camper van, which is the best and only way to explore NZ. Like where else can you drive from Rohan to Gondor within a few hours without having to need a horse? It is an unbeliavable gorgeous place. And this is coming from someone who comes from one of the most scenic places in the world, Western Canada (Canada I can show off about fairly effortlessly, Annex I, to my declaration in the first paragraph). But whereas Western Canada is so spread out (and by Western Canada, Im defining it as all of BC plus the bit of Alberta which is occupied by the Rocky Mountains, and does not by any means include any neighboring areas, such as the foothills or the plains), NZ South Island does it all within an area just slightly bigger than Vancouver Island. And by slightly bigger, I mean 5 times bigger. But still.

Fourth Impression: NZ is just WAY too fit for a nation. Its stupid. Like really. I saw a grandma running hard up a mountain, while I drove up that same mountain, and it looked like she could of beat me if I stayed in 2nd gear. Like practically sprinting! And that was with some 10-12 year old grand kids running beside her! When I was 10-12, I didnt run for fun, no the hell way. I only ran away from girls trying to headbutt me with their cabbage patch dolls, and the noises made in the forest behind my backyard which I thought was Bigfoot. I played NES Super Mario Brothers, thats what I did when I was 10-12 for fun. Running was not fun. And it shouldnt be fun for Grandmas. It just seems like everyone runs in NZ. Like everyone. And you may get that impression about some of the more cosmo cities in the world, witnessing people running in spades. However the difference about NZ is that when Kiwis run, they definitely know what they are doing by majority. Its like watching the 10,000 meter qualifications at the olympics. Perfect athletic form, crazy fast pace, and 4 to 5 out of 5 have that. That runners form, that graceful effortless stride. Anywhere else in the world, people do run, but most would look like Phoebe running in Central Park, or my mom running after a bus... not graceful. Most other places, at least half of the people running actually dont look like they know what they are doing, look stiff, have awkward gaits and look to be struggling. Its true. NZ though, its as if even grandma is channeling Paula Radcliffe and is shooting for a personal best. She would definitely kick my ass. I have no doubt, even though she was probably born in the 1930s. Kiwis are just too fit, and if they werent running they would be playing Rugby or kayaking or biking or doing push ups. Its not fair.

Anyways I find myself in NYC right now, almost two months after getting back from Aussie / NZ, there was no way I could continue on and move on with this blog without catching a bit up. Because since then Ive already been to Austria and London and now NYC, but with no mention yet whatsoever.

Now as for pictures. Theyll come soon too. Once I get back to Irlande, Im still working on them. Soon. Hopefully. Maybe. ( I always say that though )

And earlier today I saw Method Man walk by us. 18th and 6th. Jill had her back turned, and was doubtful and didnt believe me, just like how I only 95% believe her that Matt Damon ran past her in Central Park a few weeks ago. And how did I know it was him? Because its Method Man! And because I got caught looking too long, and he gave me the 'oh shit nigga, Im busted, homie knows who I am' look. You know the look.